Jun. 11th, 2009

maxwell: (Default)
I ... I can still see the cuts... just as fresh, red, and angry... seeping blood... as the day I did it to myself..


... the scars aren't to visible... faded mostly.. but I can still see them...

junior year of high school was the worst year of my life... I was so depressed... so miserable, so lonely.... I did it multiple times that year...


I recently did it again... not to recent... last year..


I've been to scared to tell anyone... but I think my friends may know...


I was caught the day after I first did it... but I told her cat scratches... fearing that she told another friend... I texted that friend and told her... cat scratches.


I believed that they bought it... but then again... how clean and straight can cat scratches get?




.... and all of a sudden... the misery... the pain... the loneliness... everything I experienced... felt... in junior high... has just flooded me...


I want to cry... but I can't... I want to sob until my cheeks are raw and my throat threatens to bleed...


but I can't.... the tears just wont come...


instead... I'm left with a throat thats tightening... hurting...

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Maxwell

June 2009

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